Ariana Grande has opened up with a heartwarming message to fans regarding her recent emotional performances.

Videos of an emotional Grande performing in her concert tour have surfaced online since she performed in Pittsburgh. The City of Pittsburgh was her ex-boyfriend the late Mac Miller’s hometown. The most recent video of the singer in obvious emotional turmoil while performing was posted by a fan last Sunday.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yX5E3WBrd4U

“She could be seen shaking her head and putting her hand to her face as she tried to continue singing the chorus, “Before you speak, don’t move / ‘Cause I don’t wanna wake up.”

The video was taken while Ari performed ‘R.E.M.’ at the Enterprise Center in St. Louis. Fans have long speculated that R.E.M. was about Miller. Grande took to Twitter to address her emotional state to fans last Sunday. The lengthy Tweet wrote:

“tour is wild. Life is wild. i’m grateful for the sea of love i have around me everyday and for the people who come to these shows and give all of us every ounce of energy they’ve got. i’m grateful to work with the best musicians and dancers in the world. i’m grateful for my voice and my team. i’m grateful for this music. i’m grateful for my tour bus driver, Kurt who bought me pickles yesterday because he saw we ran out.”

The singer — who vows to not give up from touring despite her struggles — continued, “i’m grateful for the opportunity to sing to thousands of people every night. it’s a dream come true. no matter how hard it gets or how many feelings come up that are screaming at me to be processed and sorted through one day, i’m grounded by gratitude and promise not to give up on what i’ve started.”